Looking for lyrics for this song? Please click here.

I honestly never thought I would write, much less record, a song that features me screaming during the last chorus. This song is about a very unhealthy relationship I found myself in long ago that at the time the two of us never articulated. We literally never spoke about what we were doing, and the result was that my head and heart were completely elsewhere and nowhere in particular; pretty much the textbook definition of dissociation. At the time, it never occurred to me that this was wrong; in fact, I think he wanted me asleep at the wheel, thinking perhaps that if I woke up, I would end it, which I eventually did.

It was disturbing but redemptive to revisit that time in my life, and the feelings that my producer, Kenny Schick, elicits in his interpretation of the song resonated powerfully with my fractured mindset during late 2020 to early 2021. I chose this song for the album because the last chorus, which does in fact feature me screaming, sounded like the inside of my head at the time we were working on it.

In addition to songwriting, lead vocals, and writing the harmony vocals, I performed backing vocals, including the screaming, on this song. Kenny Schick, my producer, also sang backing vocals and played or programmed all of the instruments. Kenny recorded his parts at Basement3Productions in Nashville, Tennessee, and I recorded my parts in May 2022 with Steven Glaze at ToneFreq Studio in San Jose, California.